It's that time of year again. Some days I feel so bah humbug! There are times when I wish I could fast forward over Christmas. I say that...but most days i do still LOVE IT. Christmas really is my favorite time of year. I have always loved Christmas and the Spirit it brings... it's the added anxiety and business that I could do without sometimes. And now, there is always a little bit of sadness because we lost our first baby at Christmas. Tatum would due 2 this year.
I feel like i just need to slow things down.
I like to keep busy...but, the last couple days it hit me that I am overwhelmed! I think I've hit the point where my schedule can't take on any more and I probably need to cut something out.
Too much to do and too little time!
I've already decided that I got a bit too ambitious with the preschool this year. I was naive to think that I could juggle 3 classes(and some of them back to back), an infant, a clean house, meals, church callings, my marriage, getting fit, all while having perfect hair(lol. I'm kidding of course), clothes clean and pressed, make-up on, bathrooms clean, cars clean, floors clean, and my fridge and cupboards stocked... um, just the infant part could keep me completely occupied. I was crazy! At the same time though, it was my crazy schedule that kept me from having time or energy left over to be sad about losing our baby the last couple years. My crazy busy schedule was what saved me. So, i think i was still in that frame of mind when I came up with my preschool plans for the year.
I can't believe how big chloe is getting! It kind of makes me sad that my tiny little baby isn't so tiny anymore already. I can't get enough of her. She is such a little doll. Such a happy, smart little baby. Another reason why I was crazy to take on so much! (I'm still on my, "Too much to do and TOO little time!" rant) I miss my baby every second I'm not with her...and sometimes i'm too tired to do what I want to with her once she's finally all mine. On a typical day, I'm done and ready to devote all my attention to Chloe around 4pm...and by then I AM BEAT!
So, maybe i need to take a year off next year?? And start again when Chloe is 2 turning 3 and I could start out with a younger 3 year old class. ??? I know Chloe would LOVE that!
...All just things that i am thinking about...
I feel like i need to hurry-up and make-up my mind all ready, though...I know parents are always anxious to hear how many students I'm accepting and times. The pressure is on. Decisions, decisions...
And it just dawned on me... when will we be ready to have another baby?? And how will i balance THAT when the time comes? scary. How do moms do it all?
2 comments:
You are amazing lady! I know you and know how busy you like to be, but your right, just mom/wife/homemaker/church member/daughter/sister/aunt/friend is a lot and those won't be going away! Putting totally awesome preschool teacher on the back burner will give you something to look forward to and let you enjoy your life as a young mommy! you can busy the rest of your life, enjoy it now!
I never thought I would be okay not working. But you find things that include Chloe that will keep you on a schedule and active :)
Love you!
Thanks Holly!
I made this post after having "one of those days" and I just needed to vent! I had all my preschool kids plus Chloe 2 days in a row without help(my babysitter got sick and then Tyson got a new job and doesn't have Thursdays off anymore)
You're right, though!
Next year, if I do preschool it will be just one small class. Maybe even just art class. We'll see.
I still love it... I just need some time off sometimes.
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